I've heard the NICU stay described as a "rollercoaster" more than once. And damn if that isn't the truth.
Grayson's doing ok. He still HATES the machine but they've been giving him medicine to keep him sedated so he's much more comfortable than he was. And the GOOD news is that the oscillator is doing what it's supposed to do - his oxygen requirements are still high BUT his blood gases have been AWESOME since he's been on it and they've already been able to wean him down a little bit. So that's a bright spot! Hopefully his stint on it will be short.
Thank you thank you THANK YOU for all your prayers... they are being felt and heard and answered.
And then the up... I got to hold Audrey today for the third time! And I got to hold her for A WHOLE HOUR while they administered her feeding! And her sat levels (the amount of oxygen in her blood) stayed perfect THE WHOLE TIME!!! She's really prone to de-satting when she's being messed with so that is a HUGE deal. Preemie moms always say that they're surprised at how light their babies are, but for me it's the opposite; I excpect them to be terribly fragile, like an eggshell or a Christmas ornament, so I'm always taken aback by how solid they really are. And having her against me, feeling her settle into my chest and wiggle and breathe is just... there are no words for it. And I am SO thankful that although the moments don't come often enough, they come.
I love my babies so much. And I love you all for loving them too.